doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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