just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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