he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
