Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
