wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
