a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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