My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
