I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Also, beer. Big fan.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
