yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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