remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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