yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
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