I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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