the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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