i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
