I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
