I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
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