It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Randomize
