in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
