i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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