I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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