Define "chronic" masturbator.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize