ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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