We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
