We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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