I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
