No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
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