Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
