Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
