I bet he comes in French.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
