i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I will be naked everywhere
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize