addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
