oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
