alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
