We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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