I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
