he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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