It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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