Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
