It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
