Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
