What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
