i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I am naked and annoyed.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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