it wasn't lemon gatorade
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
