do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
