My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
