Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
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