Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize