Swine flu. Run for my life!
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
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