PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Girls should come with a carfax report
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
