If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.