you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize